Babies and Bears
This year, my oldest babies would have turned eight years old.
In August of 2016, my twin boys, Matix and Tegan, were stillborn the week before our scheduled induction. My life was forever changed that day, as you can imagine. Through grief, my perspective on life was forced to shift.
I was blessed by an earth-side-angel that day, a volunteer for 'Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep' who took the above photo as well as others of my precious boys.
Just a few months later I also was blessed by the company Molly Bears, who offer special weighted teddy bears to loss parents. My Matix and Tegan bear arrived a few months before Matix and Tegan's first birthday. Holding those bears who's weight matched the birth weights of my boys was cathartic, and I knew they would hold a special place in my family. I always intended the bears to become a physical reminder and even playmates for our other children, and they certainly have become that. When we were finally blessed with our rainbow baby two and a half years later, the bears became an intentional photo-prop for sibling pictures as well.
We don't bring the bears with us to every photoshoot, and sometimes I wish we had brought them when I didn't plan to, but I try and bring them at least a few times a year, and especially while my babies are little.
Matix and Tegan's 4th Birthday
My sweet friend made me these tee shirts for our Matix and Tegan bears to match the little bubble romper for Kate, and thus the tradition of Birthday Bear Photos was born.
Link's Newborn Photos
Since all of my sons were born in August, Link's newborn photos were also very close to Matix and Tegan's 5th birthday.
Matix and Tegan's 6th Birthday
After the matching photos of Kate and the bears, I knew this dragon romper was the perfect thing to recreate it with Link.
From my Phone (pre-camera Lynzee)
From my Camera--
As my kids grow, I come to realize more and more of the little stages and moments I have missed with Matix and Tegan. Preschool and Kindergarten, Birthday parties and living room dances...
I'm lucky that with our weighted bears, at least some resemblance of sibling photos aren't completely missed at this time. There is something special for a mama to have a picture with all her babies smiling at her, and I'm grateful that I have these little bears to help make that even a sort of reality for me.